It is a shame that people generally don't like to talk about religion because it is fascinating to hear about the religions we have made up in our heads – our homemade religions.
It is amazing how often the gods we worship are much like us. They look like us and have the same opinions and worldviews as we do. Our gods think the same things we consider really bad to be really bad and are tolerant of the same things we tolerate. Republicans see god as solidly planted on their political platform and the Democrats are sure their god is all about what the Party stands for. Our homemade religions that are a mishmash of Christianity, ideas from self help gurus, a little new age thinking, some ideas that make us feel better about ourselves and concerns for social issues that can be addressed from the comfort of our homes via a letter writing campaign or a candlelight vigil.
No wonder we tend to make up our own little religions. I don't mean to be critical, but when it came to designing a religion, when God designed Christianity, He/She/It didn't do a very good job. Maybe that is why we have such an overwhelming desire to design our own.
If God had put me in charge of designing Christianity, I would have done it quite differently. I would have gone more for a generic, catch all religion. For example, what is this Father-Son thing between God and Jesus? Doesn't that leave mothers and daughters out? How can women possibly identify with such a male dominated religion?
And while we are on the subject of exclusive, what about this thing Jesus said? "I am the way, the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." Excuse me! Talk about narrow minded! That just will not do. You can call me ugly, you can call me stupid and you can call me to dinner, but don't you dare call me narrow minded. In an earlier time it was unacceptable to lie, cheat, steal, commit adultery or be other than heterosexual. Today's unpardonable sin is being narrow-minded. God should have known that and told Jesus not to say what he said. My Christ would have said, "I am the way, the truth and the life. But, aw shucks, you go do what ever you please."
This sin thing is a bit of a bother, too. Who has the power to define sin or sins? And where do you get off calling me a sinner? You are no better than I. And doesn't God realize what life is all about? It is about me having fun, doing my own thing and being fulfilled. Accomplishing all of that may require me to do a little of what the Bible calls sinning. It sometimes seems that being good is like being on a diet. My doctor says that the general rule of dieting is "If it tastes good, it is not on your diet." No sin, no fun? We are going to have to rethink this whole sin thing. I think we can solve the problem by just redefining and renaming the things we used to call sins. Perhaps we could call them personal choices, none of your business or lifestyles.
Also, friends, we are going to have to do something about this sacrifice and blood stuff. The blood and gore of Jesus dying on the cross makes a lot of people uncomfortable if not just plain nauseous. Religion needs to be clean and sterile while also being warm, cozy and inviting. Lose the blood stuff. It is just too messy. And skip the sacrifice. It sounds like no fun. Not only does God claim to have made a sacrifice for us, He/She/It expects us to make sacrifices for Him/Her/It and for our fellow man/woman. Sacrifice is not a part of our agenda. Fun, games, accumulating wealth, gaining financial security, extending our credit line and having everything the advertisements tell us we need – they are on the agenda. Sacrifice is not!
While we are at it, let's make the whole thing more believable. The whole concept of God coming to earth is not that easy to swallow. But being born in a stable in a small town in the middle of nowhere to Mr. and Mrs. Nobody – give me a break! And Ms. Nobody is a virgin? Who is going to believe that one? And to make matters worse they add a few thousand angels and a couple dozen shepherds and a star and three kings and you have stretched credibility well past the breaking point.
The beginning of the whole "Jesus Story Thing" starts off hard to believe and goes down hill from there. Miracles, walking on water, water changed to wine, the blind given sight, the lame start walking and demons running all over the place fill in the middle part of the story. For a grand finale (skipping over the disgusting cross part) we have an incredible tale about the tomb of Jesus being empty and him rising from the dead. Get real! In this age of reason, demythologizing, logic, computers and the scientific method, who is going to buy that wild story?
Let's face it. Any of us could design a more palatable and believable religion than that. And we have. It is called Humanism. Most people don't know it has a name but it is religiously taught in our schools, our homes and most of our churches. Talk to people about Christianity and the conversation can soon become ridiculous. People say things like, "I don't believe that Jesus really walked on the earth, but I am a Christian." "That resurrection stuff is just a silly story but I am a Christian." "I may screw anything that is still breathing but I am a Christian." "I don't believe in that sin crap because God wants me to be happy so I can do whatever I like to or with whomever I please. And, yes, I am a Christian." So if you want to really get a person who makes statements much like these angry, tell them they aren't a Christian. Or if you want to fire up an educated religious type, just tell them it sounds like they are a humanist. Whoa, will the sparks ever fly. Their favorite thing to say is, "How dare you judge me? Who are you to say if I am a Christian or not?"
Oh, gee, I don't know. How could I? Let's say, you smell bad, you have puke on your shirt, your breath smells like bourbon, and you can hardly talk or stand up straight. Few people would disagree with me if I drew the conclusion that you have been drinking. I may be wrong but my chances of being wrong are miniscule. Let's carry that over and say that you claim to be a Christian but you believe whatever you please; doubt that the founder of the faith really existed or, if he did, most of his story is a bunch of bull; the book that records the story of your faith is unreliable; the Bible records that some behavior you are doing is not okay with God but He/She/It could not have possibly meant that because you like doing it; Jesus didn't really rise from the dead, that is just a spiritual metaphor for changing into a nicer person and God is much too nice to be a part of the unpardonable sin – narrow-mindedness. With a great deal of confidence it could be said that you are not a Christian. Putting together some obvious evidence and coming to a rational conclusion is not being judgmental. Duh. I am not suggesting that such a person is not a nice person, he or she just does not meet the definition of a Christian.
Somehow many people have come to believe that being is Christian is about thinking the right things, about being nice about the things I choose to be nice about, recycling, being for social justice (Not necessarily doing anything about it.) believing that there probably is a god of some sort, and hanging around with other people like themselves.
In all honesty, it is just because Christianity is so implausible that I believe it. Contrary to the conclusions many people seem to have arrived at, God is not stupid. If He/She/It had wanted to design a religion to please man, it would have looked a lot more like Humanism than Christianity. But God didn't design Christianity to please man. He designed it to save man because He knew we needed to be saved considerably more than we needed to be pleased. As the old saying goes, "If our greatest need had been information, God would have sent us an educator. If our greatest need had been technology, God would have sent us a scientist. If our greatest need had been money, God would have sent us an economist. If our greatest need had been pleasure, God would have sent us an entertainer. But our greatest need was forgiveness, so God sent us a Savior.
And if we ever figure that out, the whole thing might start to both make sense and work. As G. K. Chesterson said, "Christianity has never been tried and found wanting. Christianity has never really been tried." What do you say, let's give it a shot?
Copyright © 2009 by William T. McConnell, III, All Rights Reserved
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